FoShizzle Movie Reviews
Dark Skies (2013)
Starring: Keri Russell, Josh Hamilton, Dakota Goyo and Kadan Rockett as Sam Barrett
So, aliens, far superior beings who can travel lightyears in seconds are going to walk into our houses, sneak around, scare the Hell out of us and creep slowly after us in the hall.  Logical.
What I Think: Making a serious horror movie about aliens is a dangerous thought to have in your mind, mainly because their scare-factor has fallen out of favor, whereas demons and spirits have been horrifying people since long before William Friedkin’s The Exorcist and that isn’t going to change; writer-director Scott Stewart’s Dark Skies is a prime example of why it won’t be changing.  Nothing happens here at all, it starts of slow even though it follows the usual formula of strange goings on in the night with a loud soundtrack.  If that isn’t sad enough, the few things that happen during the day (Russell’s breakdown, the birds-to-house-collision) are literally hilarious; I laughed harder than at most comedy movies!  This is the perfect horror movie to watch with your friends and laugh and make fun of.  You see the aliens (who aren’t scary) and you watch them go through the house at night on videotape (and this comes from the producer of Insidious, the Paranormal Activity series and Sinister (please tell me I didn’t have to boldface the last two movies for you to understand how they tie in): Jason Blum) and in the end nothing you haven’t seen before happens.  And to make matters worse than that (!) Russell has a literally unplayable part (and she fulfills those expectations in the aforementioned breakdown scene) and Hamilton overplays his anxious character (who also has time to be a skeptic I guess).  Only the skilled J.K. Simmons comes out unscathed with an interesting part and an intriguing performance to match.  Music by Joseph Bishara/ executive produced by Bob Weinstein and Harvey Weinstein.  How dare they use the famed Two Possibilities Arthur C. Clarke quote at the start!  Really not even that disturbing, which is a movie like this’s only fallback.  (NOT WORTH WATCHING/5 Stars)

Dark Skies (2013)

Starring: Keri Russell, Josh Hamilton, Dakota Goyo and Kadan Rockett as Sam Barrett

So, aliens, far superior beings who can travel lightyears in seconds are going to walk into our houses, sneak around, scare the Hell out of us and creep slowly after us in the hall.  Logical.

What I Think: Making a serious horror movie about aliens is a dangerous thought to have in your mind, mainly because their scare-factor has fallen out of favor, whereas demons and spirits have been horrifying people since long before William Friedkin’s The Exorcist and that isn’t going to change; writer-director Scott Stewart’s Dark Skies is a prime example of why it won’t be changing.  Nothing happens here at all, it starts of slow even though it follows the usual formula of strange goings on in the night with a loud soundtrack.  If that isn’t sad enough, the few things that happen during the day (Russell’s breakdown, the birds-to-house-collision) are literally hilarious; I laughed harder than at most comedy movies!  This is the perfect horror movie to watch with your friends and laugh and make fun of.  You see the aliens (who aren’t scary) and you watch them go through the house at night on videotape (and this comes from the producer of Insidious, the Paranormal Activity series and Sinister (please tell me I didn’t have to boldface the last two movies for you to understand how they tie in): Jason Blum) and in the end nothing you haven’t seen before happens.  And to make matters worse than that (!) Russell has a literally unplayable part (and she fulfills those expectations in the aforementioned breakdown scene) and Hamilton overplays his anxious character (who also has time to be a skeptic I guess).  Only the skilled J.K. Simmons comes out unscathed with an interesting part and an intriguing performance to match.  Music by Joseph Bishara/ executive produced by Bob Weinstein and Harvey Weinstein.  How dare they use the famed Two Possibilities Arthur C. Clarke quote at the start!  Really not even that disturbing, which is a movie like this’s only fallback.  (NOT WORTH WATCHING/5 Stars)


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